Next week my book Who Am I and What Am I Doing With My Life comes out. What’s in it for you? Stability. It’s in the subtitle: Finding Stability and Purpose in Jesus.
Since identity language has taken over our lives, the idea of “discovering your identity” has taken on mythical power. People are always popping out from behind bushes to promise that for the low, low price of $1499 and twelve hours of your time, they can help you unlock your true identity. Or you hear about some executive or celebrity disappearing for a month-long spiritual retreat (always in Aspen or the Cayman Islands), and soaring back with a rediscovered self.
In lieu of these, ordinary people turn to therapists, a self-help book, or the nethers of social media gurus in hopes of getting a store brand version of the same.
No doubt some of the problem is obsessive navel-gazing. Self-actualization has replaced those lesser virtues—you know, things like love, charity, wisdom, and justice. But proper self-reflection is not the villain. Socrates’ dictum, “know thyself,” isn’t necessarily followed by “…and nothing else.” Paul commands believers to “examine themselves,” and James compares the Bible to a mirror we should use to look closely at ourselves (2 Corinthians 13:5; James 1:22).
One of our chief liabilities is that we don’t have a clear understanding of what identity really is. This mixes dangerously with an unreflective, continually distracted existence. Hence, if you pause for an hour or two—with a therapist, book, retreat, or online forum—and really think about yourself, you’re liable to hit upon some identity revelation which feels like the psychological equivalent of String Theory.
It’s this identity a-ha moment where a new revelation re-orients everything you’ve ever thought about yourself—past, present, and future. You unlock some past childhood memory, face a frustrated desire, or see some common thread running through your most meaningful relationships. That explains everything! The point of this book is not to wave off such discoveries, but to properly locate them on the map of your identity.
The Bible offers us a detailed identity map that holds true for every person in every time. There are stable truths about who you are and who you’re meant to become. For instance, you’re created in the image of God. You’re meant to become more like Jesus. These are like mountains, rivers, and lakes on your identity map. Most importantly, you have a destination—to be with Jesus, like Jesus. These never move.
In this book, I want you to become familiar with the major terrain and general path of your identity journey. You will always be discovering new parts of your identity, and you will always be moving. But if you know the map, you’re less likely to get disoriented by one of these revelations, and say, Oh my goodness, I’ve never felt my father’s acceptance; or I’ve been afraid of commitment because I’m afraid of rejection—I need to chuck it all and start over.
If you’re familiar with the Bible’s map, you will know that there are certain things about your identity you don’t need to chuck, indeed that you cannot chuck. You’ll learn to expect identity revelations, welcome them, and color them in as details in the right places on your map. In a word, I hope Who Am I brings you stability amidst the never-ending pressure to reinvent yourself.
You can order the book here. It would mean a lot to me if you can leave an Amazon or Goodreads review!
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