I took a Winnie the Pooh personality test and ended with the dreaded result: I’m Eeyore. My condemning answers identified a preference for introspection and alone time. That hardly captures the awfulness of the original.
The Disney-fied version of Eeyore is a comically gloomy pessimist. He’s the wet blanket the others rally around, the contrast that accents the kind-hearted, joyful spirits of Pooh, Piglet and Tigger. In the book, however, he represents something darker—he is an unnerving depiction of self-centered depression. As someone who struggles with depression, the caricature hit a little too close to home
Near the end of the Pooh anthology, Eeyore announces, with great pomp, that he has written a poem. The title is “Poem,” and the content does little to augment the title’s creativity. As soon as he finishes reading, the dialogue goes as follows:
“If anybody wants to clap,” said Eeyore… “now is the time to do it.”
They all clapped.
“Thank you,” said Eeyore. “Unexpected and gratifying, if a little lacking in Smack.”
“It’s much better than mine,” said Pooh admiringly, and he really thought it was.
“Well,” explained Eeyore modestly, “it was meant to be.”
The key phrase is Eeyore’s description of the applause as “unexpected and gratifying, if a little lacking in smack” (meaning umph). Obviously it was expected, but Eeyore must still cast himself as the victim. He is downtrodden and forgotten, ignored, abused, and taken for granted. He is a black hole of praise and attention. When people do recognize him, it is only natural, and frankly, overdue and understated.
We often assume that people who struggle with depression have low self-image and so we need to ladle up heaps of affirmation. This is only sometimes true. It’s never wrong to offer praise when deserved, but Eeyore shows that just as often, pride lies underneath. Pride perpetuates a terrible cycle of self-pitying despondency.
Pride tells you that you are worth a lot more than you’re getting. You’re amazing, brilliant, talented, kind, considerate, and self-sacrificing—it’s just no one ever sees. No one recognizes how exceptionally humble and valuable you really are. Poor you.
Once you’ve got your self-pity engine humming, it’s a short ride to depression. The world around you is cruel and unfair—you’ll never get what you deserve; you should learn to expect that. Keep your head down. Wallow in the mud. Others begin to notice. Everyone understands being treated unfairly and suffering the blues. No fault in that. They rally around you and try to pick up your spirits. Now comes the bitter trap.
If you respond to the praise, encouragement, and kindness of those around you—if you emerge from depression, pick up your head and see light again, the kindness of others will dissipate. You no longer need it. You’ve gained the attention you felt you deserved by sinking into self-pity and dragging others down with you. But you can only get more of what you want by feeling you never get it. And the more you convince yourself, the better you’ll be at convincing others.
What’s the solution? How do you avoid becoming Eeyore? How do you get better once you are? The truth is, we all have plenty of Eeyore inside. The solution is the gospel.
The gospel declares that you have received something you absolutely did not deserve. You’ll never deserve it. You haven’t received the gospel if you feel depressed about getting it. And what you’ve received—eternal life—is the most significant reward you can ever get. Even if every other person in your life were truly giving you less esteem than you deserve, God is giving you more.
Secondly, the gospel focuses your joy on Jesus, not yourself. Self-pity has less inroads the less you focus on yourself. In a gospel-centered life, your pursuit of happiness is not dependent on whether you believe other people recognize your supreme worth, it depends on recognizing Jesus’ supreme worth.
This doesn’t mean you won’t have your Eeyore moments –days when the bitterness of rejection envelopes you and throws you in the deep. It doesn’t mean you have to put on a brave face and pretend you’re not floundering under water. It means you won’t stop fighting to regain the light above because you’re looking above, not at yourself.
My interview with Carl Trueman and Todd Pruitt on Mortification of Spin just came out. You can listen here, or wherever you like your podcasts.
Enjoying Identity & Literature? Check out Charlotte’s Web and the Selfishness of Maturity
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